If you have arrived at this page using a search engine to find yourself an e-pal, I'm happy to write to you. (My e-mail address is at the bottom of every page). If you think you'd like to exchange mail with me, feel free to send a note. If you are looking for a penpal or e-pal from another country, of the other sex, or a different age, may I suggest you try Penpals International?
The intention of what follows on this page is to indicate my experiences with on-line friendships. It is not a listing of possible e-pals.
I tend to not hang around with "the guys" as none of the usual "guy" activities do anything for me. I'm not into watching or having a verbal dissection of any sport; I don't drink beer; I tend to find that the usual "guys" and I have so little to talk about, so I tended to migrate to where the women were talking. I still prefer to chat with women than men, so my e-pal list should not be too surprising!
The following is a list of the "ladies" that I exchanged e-mail with. Some I met. Some became friends. Others just disappeared into the dust again. In writing this up, I had a look to see if any of their profiles were still there on the relevant dating site. Thankfully, I couldn't find many. I did note that a large number of the ones who had snubbed me were still actively looking!!! Wonder if that tells you anything???
As I find the time, I'll add in a bit about each of these....
Sara
Sara and I met via a penpals site. I got to learn bits about Sweden and the lifestyle over there, and Sara got to learn a little about Australia. We chatted about most things and I got her interested in Rottweilers when her dog passed away. We got reasonably close and even chatted about visiting one another. Then she got involved in adopting kids who needed her financial assistance and Sweden's health system, and since has dropped out of email all together.
Susan
Susan and I also met via a penpals site. Susan was living in Alabama when we first started writing. Later she met a chap in Perth, fell madly in love with him, and moved there with her daughter to marry and be with him. She recently became an Australian citizen! Every so often we still swap a light hearted e-mail or ICQ message.
As Susan was having SO much fun chatting with someone as entertaining as me, she asked if I'd mind also sending some mail to her married girlfriend to cheer her up. Felisha and I corresponded for a while, and I think just got busy with life.
Melissa also found me on a penpal site and told me bits and pieces about her life in a small USA town, and about being caught up with a no-hoper husband. After chatting, I think it was me who helped give her confidence to move on and move her and her kids out to their own place. All was going well until her ex sat down on a train track and got various limbs cut off. She looked after him for a while, and found the strength to move on once more. I haven't heard from Missy in a while and hope she is still doing okay.
Masae
A rather strange little e-mail arrived in my inbox one day. It was from Masae. We sent some cheeky mail to each other and I ended up heading up her way for a holiday when I was feeling low. We had a great time, and a few months later Masae came for a visit to my place. We got on reasonably well together, but I was struggling with the idea of being an instant "daddy" to her 3 children. I told her I couldn't promise her anything which was fine until she realised I also meant sexually. First she told me that she didn't want to know me anymore unless it could be exclusively, and then later she realised that she still wanted to have me as a friend.
Around about the same time, another strange little e-mail popped up in my inbox. It was from Kris in the USA who had found me on a penpals page. We wrote a fait bit, and I even rang on a couple of occasions and we got quite close. I was even getting used to the idea of her teenage children. When I said I was going to come over for a visit, she finally told me that she was married. Well sort of anyhow. Her husband was actually her ex, and he was living in the same house and she was his keeper as he was dying of cancer. Then a got a couple of e-mails from her identical twin sister warning me off. A little while later Teddy, the "evil" twin died in a light plane crash in Spain.
Shortly after I advised Kris that I'd found Shona, she wrote back to tell me she'd found a really great guy locally and was pregnant to him. Not too long after that she miscarried.
It's been a while since Kris and I have swapped mail, but she may recall that I told her she kinda scared me with how many new bits of information came out virtually every time we "spoke". Even so, she has definitely been a learning ground for me. Amongst other things, I have a bit of an education on the Blackfoot Indians.
Elizabeth
Once I'd joined up on Webpersonals (now Lavalife) and bought my first electronic "stamps", I sent my first note to Elizabeth in Canada. She was the first one to catch my eye, and I was new to the idea of meeting anyone on the Internet, so maybe someone a long way away was the best way to start? We swapped a few messages and things just tapered off after that.
Jacqui never had her picture up on her Webpersonals profile, but her spiel about herself sounded interesting (plus she lived locally), so I spent a stamp and wrote her a note. We swapped a few messages and joked with each other mainly about her twin boys. When Shona and I went for a visit we finally met face to face. Every so often we swap e-mails and ICQ messages still.
Her Internet profile is: I have a great sense of humour,(very dry infact), which gets me into trouble sometimes. I have a strong sense of compassion, I am passionate in my outlook and have an open mind. I am independent and my life is complete, a Man would be someone to compliment me not complete me. A little harsh perhaps? I guess what I am saying is that I am ready to share my life with some one special but not ready to give it. I am however, a firm believer that life is meant to be shared, we certainly are not meant to do this alone. Life is a journey of up's and down's, I am ready to share the good and the bad, my strength and my weakness, as I would hope you are too. My friends say I am outgoing and funny and fun to be with, the life of the party in fact. Now I love a good karaoke bar as much as the next but I know that life can be serious as well. I love travelling but have not had the chance to do it often, I will make it to Broome though, that is on my "must do" list and the list broadens. I am intelligent and love stimulating conversation and company. I love eating out and in, with good food, company and wine. Seems everyone here does though so now wonder it is hard to get a reservation in a good restaurant at short notice these days..:) Indian being my favorite food as it reflects the very me that I am, full of a variety of spices for a complex person who consists of lots of different spices too. Lets chat..!
I was having a look through the profiles of people on a penpals page as well as www.rsvp.com.au and www.friend.com.au and noted on one of these that Karen had a similar surname to someone who was giving me a really hard time. I thought "maybe one letter can make all the difference?" and sent Karen a note. We met a short while later and had a few outings. When I got home from visiting Masae, Karen asked why I had gone to visit her. It seemed she had some designs on me herself. We got close for a while, but I couldn't see myself fitting into Karen's lifestyle which included 3 young children. We are still friends (and Karen and Shona also like each other), and we visit each other every so often and chat via ICQ.
Karen's Internet profile is: Hi I am a warm hearted girl with an adventurious spirit. I am told I have an infectious laugh with a good sense of humour and am told easy to talk too although a little shy at first. I believe all good relationships begin as good friendships and of course there has to be chemistry to help along the way. I have three children whom I have every second weekend if you concider children as a "baggage" then dont read any further....... I am looking for someone who knows what they want out of life and knows where they are going. Someone whos not afraid to show his feelings. A soul mate with whom to share secrets...... The best thing an ex boyfreind ever said to me was that I was more like a mate than a girlfriend which I thought was great as you guys dont always want your girlfriends around but your mates anytime... I enjoy doing most things but most of all enjoy good company good conversation and lots of great cuddles..... If you think we may have something in common...
Karen has recently found herself a fella (who LOVES kids), and they are doing quite nicely!
Anna was a lovely looking and well written lady a couple of years my senior who wrote to me via the RSVP site asking if I'd like an interstate penpal who could possibly be a guide when I was in her home town. I wrote back and said that would be lovely, and as it happened I would be in her home town in about a week. She rang me on my mobile when I was local to her and I promised to ring her back. My mobile never captured her telephone number, and she never responded to any more of my messages.
Rena
One of Rena's children was looking through a penpal site and found the blurb about me that I'd written. She said, "Mum, he sounds like you"! So Rena (from the USA) related this to me in her first e-mail. As I was spending a large amount of time just writing e-mails to everyone on my list, it got to the point where I felt all typed out and in need of other activities. I related this to Rena, and she read between t he lines that I didn't want to write to her any more. After she sent a note wishing my evil to come back at me, we didn't get to write too much more after that.
Leonie was on the Webpersonals site and we swapped a couple of very short e-mails before she revealed that she hated e-mail and would much prefer phone calls. As we were not in the same city, the calls never got to happen.
Sannie
Sannie and I started writing via Webpersonals. She had met up with one of the people she was writing to and he turned out to be still married and 10 years older than he led her to believe. She told me all about this and how she had lost confidence in Webpersonals. Not long after that she stopped writing altogether.
Yvonne
I don't recall how Yvonne from Canada and I found each other, but we wrote for quite a while, and I even made it onto Yvonne's joke's list. We've drifted apart since and it's been quite awhile since we shared any mail.
I think Cindi and I were both fascinated by Webpersonals' assessment that we were 98% compatible with each other. We wrote some interesting notes to each other and then thought we'd try some conversation in person over dinner. We both had a good evening and chatted and laughed easily. I treated her like a lady all evening (which is how I treat women that I'm with!) and at the end of the evening she granted me permission to continue to send her email! As Cindy had mentioned she wanted friends that she could go out with, I felt quite rejected that I was not good enough to have any further meals with!
Elly
Elly was also via Webpersonals. She was a bit older but lived nearby and sounded like she might be fun. We swapped a few e-mails and I helped her do her Christmas shopping. When she was looking for a place to stay, I offered one of the spare rooms as a possibility. All seemed fine until she told me that she really wished she could be together with her kids again (particularly her 16 year old daughter). When I said her daughter was welcome to the third bedroom, it seemed I had instantly become a dirty old man in Elly's eyes! I was trying to help her out, and she said "I'd never allow my daughter to stay with you". Shows there was a lot of trust there [not]. Hope it's coming together for you these days, Elly.
I think it was my first ever experience on a chat site and I was being a bit cheeky and Linda liked that. She sent me a private note after I left the room and we wrote for a while. Linda also added me to her jokes list. We've been out of contact for some time now.
Another lady on the RSVP site. I was quite taken by her profile and wrote a note telling her that. She wrote back a lovely note. I wrote some more and a week later received a response that she'd just started a relationship with a chap off another site and was looking to see where that would go. As I haven't heard anything, I kinda guess she's doing 'great guns'. (Surely she wouldn't have just been being polite about her new relationship, rather than telling me I was someone that she didn't want to write to?)
Gigi
Gigi was looking for someone to help her raise her 6 daughters, and had her own home page on a dating site. I thought what she presented was quite lovely and she sounded like a doting mother and I wrote and told her so. We had a chat via one of the chat programs and she sent me photos of herself and all of her girls. I sent back a note and included my picture and was wondering how I'd go with that many little personalities in the one place at one time. I don't believe I ever heard from Gigi again.
Mae was another of the Webpersonals ladies I exchanged a few e-mails with. She was ever so sweet and lovely with a bright and happy disposition and a happy family life. There was quite a few years difference in our ages, and when I was getting fed up with living my life through e-mail I suggested that she should spend more of her time writing to people her own age. I wasn't trying to upset her, but I never heard from her again.
Trasy
Trasy wrote to me via Webpersonals for a couple of weeks. Her husband had died a few years earlier and she was bringing up her teenage son by herself. I don't know why the notes stopped after just those two weeks, but she seemed to be a sweet person.
Chris
I wrote Chris a note via the RSVP site and she responded that she was new to that way of dating and was keeping her options open. We wrote another couple of notes the last of which from her had a comment about a guy she had JUST heard from via RSVP and wanting to keep her options open. I never heard from her again, so presume the new guy was everything she was looking for.
I wrote to Connie after finding her profile on a penpal website. I got a note back that she wasn't really looking for penpals and that someone must have put her profile up as she hadn't. We wrote every so often for a couple of years, and I used to keep track of Connie's exploits via her Website. She was off to Hawaii, then to Germany and seemed to be having a ball of a time. She wrote about getting a modelling chance for some local catalogue and then she got sick. Next thing I get a note from her girlfriend that she's very ill and not able to type. A few short notes later, and the girlfriend writes again with the sad news that Connie has passed away.
About a year after that I got a note from one of the other guys that Connie had been communicating with, and he asked me what I knew for sure about Connie as he'd never been able to find any evidence of her ever existing!
Pavla
Pavla and I found each other via a Penpals site. She is happily married and has two children. Apart from being interested in each other's cultures, Pavla appreciated me checking her translation work as English was not her first language. I still hear every so often from her, and she always sends me a card or note for my birthday.
Julie had a profile up on the www.friend.com.au site (and I think she also had one on RSVP). I wrote and she advised that she'd only just made her profile visible again after dating a guy for 2 months and he'd asked her to marry him. There were only a couple of notes swapped, and I never heard again after I sent her my photo! Surely it wasn't my handsome(?) physiognomy that steered her away? I tend to think that Julie just needed some time.
Jenny
Jenny and I went on a course together. On the last day of the course I learnt that she was a dungeon mistress! As I'd always wondered about Dungeons and Dragons, I asked if I could come along to the next session. We sent a few e-mails and I ended up joining the group and playing once a month or so for a couple of years. Once it all got too hard to get everyone together, the group just faded away.
Naomi
Naomi was a little "under the weather" at a pub after the annual work Christmas party. She seemed to be very friendly, and my female partner felt a little threatened by the idea of having a girl like her in that way! They went off and danced for quite some time together all the same. Then Naomi disappeared! I wrote to her at work the next day and asked what happened. She said she felt embarrassed when she realised that she was making a fool of herself, so she thought it best to jump in a cab and go home. We wrote for a while until she stopped working at the same place.
I was initially Annie's boss and we worked quite closely to structure a support team that was struggling to meet it's objectives. We worked quite well as a team as we were both focussed on delivery for the customer. As well as swapping e-mails about work, we used to send a joke or a note every so often to cheer each other up. When my marriage faltered and fell apart, Annie and I got closer for a while. And when I had no other date, Annie volunteered.
Roxy
Roxy wrote me a note after she'd read my RSVP profile, and then she seemed to disappear. I wrote back twice, and in my second note advised I'd be away for a few weeks for a holiday. In her second note, she mentioned that she had 3 almost grown up children and there'd be no photo until we got to know each other better. This note came whilst I was away and she also hoped that I would have a good holiday. She sent another note the same day I got home. She feared that she'd scared me off, but offered her mobile phone number. I rang and the conversation was very awkward for us both so we never got in contact again.
Tanya had just met someone that she'd met in the real world (rather than on-line), but she said she was always interested in more friends. We wrote for a couple of weeks and she shared that she had had a couple of crappy relationships and she'd received some unsavoury e-mails, so she was treading very carefully. She wished me a great time on my holidays and I never heard from her again.
Anthea
Anthea had a profile on RSVP which suggested she needed a guide to show her around Melbourne. I wrote to volunteer! She responded that she was moving down to be nearer her son. There were quite a few e-mails for a few days and then Anthea stopped writing.
Carla
Carla's profile on RSVP contained a "hit list" of non-desirable attributes in a fella. I actually had none of those traits so I thought I should write! I got one lovely note back and never heard from Carla again!
Margie had recently moved to Melbourne and her profile on RSVP indicated that she was interested in making friends. I was also interested in making more friends, so I wrote to her. I got a note back the next day and then never heard from her again for two months. I wrote again and asked if I'd scared her off. She responded that she'd been really busy with studies and moving and tae kwon do, and maybe she'd like to keep it to penpals rather than friends. I wrote back and never heard from Margie again.
Cathy
Cathy from the USA and I swapped a couple of bits of mail via RSVP, so I sent her my direct e-mail address but never heard from her again.
Emily was my first positive response off the RSVP site. We swapped a few E-mails and then she was off on a trip to New York and Paris. When she got back we continued to swap a few bits of mail. They got shorter and shorter until she confessed that she wasn't much of a writing sort of person, but maybe I'd like to ring her? I no longer recall what transpired during our first and last conversation. We haven't been in contact since then.
Karen and I started writing after one of us found the other on ICQ. Karen was busy bringing up 3 kids by herself, and was usually too busy to get much time to type notes on her computer.
Jan
Jan and I first met whilst I was playing backgammon on Zone quite regularly. We also got a few games of cribbage happening. (I hadn't played that one since my father, his brother and my grandfather used to break out the cards and cribbage boards!) Jan started out in Sydney and we met once when she visited Melbourne. Shortly afterwards Jan was off overseas to visit with her new love that she'd met on Zone. Next thing I heard was that she'd moved to Adelaide to be with her man.
Sandra asked for me to add her to my Windows Messenger list one day. She's since taught me a little Spanish, and I've helped her a little with her English. As I have always wanted to visit South America (more particularly the Amazon area and where the Incas lived), I promised Sandra we'd visit her in Chile one day. She is looking for someone to love her and her young son, and asked me if I knew of any such person that I could recommend. Just recently she wrote to advise that she is seeking to go and live in Belgium with a very special person. Some recent exchanges have disclosed that she is very happy in her new life and country and plans are underway for her son to join her now that she has re-married! I truly hope things work out as she is such a sweet and wonderful lady!
Jo
Another sweet and lovely lady. Jo and I used to play Backgammon on-line a bit and kidded around with each other. We then found that we both used ICQ and have continued our occasional chats there. As Jo is in England with her loving hubby and two children, the chats were when we were both up at the same time and not busy with the other aspects of our lives.
Lizzy
Liz and I had a chat one evening in the chat part of Webpersonals (I think) and then swapped a few e-mails before the conversation petered out.
Sheryl
In the few pieces of e-mail that Sheryl and I exchanged, I learnt that she had a Triumph motor bike that she loved roaring around on.
Across the various sites I had a profile on, I used a number of "handles". Interestingly enough I never had any interest nor responses when my handle was "CrustyOldSeaman". So, unless you look like a Greek Adonis be wary of the handle you use as some ladies read more into it!
Mostly whilst I had a profile on the dating sites it contained text much like this:
On RSVP:
I have a history of working too hard, but have slowed down to smell the roses. Now - be lovely to do that with someone who appreciates them! Weekends away would be great! Ah! To have someone to buy little surprises for. A dinner out with fine food and a glass or two of fine red. A cold evening walk along a wild ocean beach, stumbling along trying to keep warm in a big woollen jacket whilst still managing to watch the sun set. Sharing a laugh, a story, a joke, a coffee, a Sunday brunch.
I'm hoping to one day find a slender, long haired lady, who loves being a woman. Regardless of the outfit, from a pair of 501s and a sloppy joe through the LBD to a stunning evening gown, she exudes her femininity because she knows she looks great!
Meantime, I'll start to expand my horizons and get my travel plans underway..... Be lovely to share the journey!
Kind and caring soul who has been around the traps a few times. Ultimately looking for a lady who can make a promise to love, honour and cherish until death do us part, and then live by that! Meantime, I'd like to get to know some other kind caring souls!
Beyond just pleasant conversation, there has to be a spark which stimulates the desires for more in both parties. To make me spark takes a slender lady who takes pride in herself! A lady who enjoys all things female, and while she can stand on her own two feet, she adores being pampered and looked after.
I have a history of working too hard, but have now slowed down to smell the roses. Now - be lovely to do that with someone who appreciates them! Weekends away would be great! Ah! To have someone to buy little surprises for. A dinner out with fine food and a bottle of fine red. A cold evening walk along a wild ocean beach, stumbling along trying to keep warm in a big woollen jacket whilst still managing to watch the sun set. Sharing a laugh, a story, a joke, a coffee, a Sunday brunch.
As I like to engage in conversation, I'm interested in a lady that is happy to communicate openly and honestly. I hate to try and guess what's on a woman's mind! (If I'm not sure what you mean, I WILL ask!)
I give a reasonable full body, relaxation massage, and love to do that for my partner. If not all over, I can tend to sit whilst chatting and I'll be giving a foot massage at the same time. As I get to know a lady better, I really enjoy giving a head massage and running my fingers through her hair.
Whilst I adore all the caring and sharing and togetherness, I believe that it is paramount that "individual time" is still exercised for both parties in a relationship.
I love making things and being creative. I am easily made happy by just pottering in a garden, or converting some sticks of wood into furniture!
Oh, one last thing - I'm the sort of guy that stops and asks directions!
A rather strange little e-mail arrived in my inbox one day. It was from 
Around about the same time, another strange little e-mail popped up in my inbox. It was from 
Once I'd joined up on 
I was having a look through the profiles of people on a penpals page as well as 
One of Rena's children was looking through a penpal site and found the blurb about me that I'd written. She said, "Mum, he sounds like you"! So 
I don't recall how 
I think 
I think it was my first ever experience on a chat site and I was being a bit cheeky and Linda liked that. She sent me a private note after I left the room and we wrote for a while. Linda also added me to her jokes list. We've been out of contact for some time now.
Another lady on the RSVP site. I was quite taken by her profile and wrote a note telling her that. She wrote back a lovely note. I wrote some more and a week later received a response that she'd just started a relationship with a chap off another site and was looking to see where that would go. As I haven't heard anything, I kinda guess she's doing 'great guns'. (Surely she wouldn't have just been being polite about her new relationship, rather than telling me I was someone that she didn't want to write to?)
I was initially 
T
M
C
K
J
S
Another sweet and lovely lady. 
L
Sheryl
Kind and caring soul who has been around the traps a few times. Ultimately looking for a lady who can make a promise to love, honour and cherish until death do us part, and then live by that! Meantime, I'd like to get to know some other kind caring souls!