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I am still angered by some peoples ignorance, from people who suffer from mild back pain one or two days a year and think they have the same pain as me, but they can “work through it” to people who think I’m a bludger. I just don't let it get to me like it used to. I still don’t go to large gatherings or parties for the same reasons.
So please if you know someone who suffers from pain like me, try to have some compassion and think carefully about what you say.
And remember all back pain is not the same, I remember when I was about 18 years old I strained a muscle in my back and had to rest for 3 days, it used to flare up once or twice a year after that. But after a day or two or a visit to a physiotherapist or chiropractor it would go away again and I would return to running, jumping, lifting, etc. with no problems. I was able to keep working through that pain as it was nothing compared to what I have suffered since the accident so please don't think its the same.
And please don't think its just a matter of the pain sufferer pushing themselves “through the pain barrier”, I understand for minor pain this is possible but I had been doing this for years and it only increased my pain levels.
If you suffer from severe pain don't give up if your current doctor isn’t helping, keep seeing doctors until you find the right one, as doctors are not all the same, some are good some are bad.
I cope mentally by refusing to look at the negative side of things, I try to only look at the positives and I avoid situations where there is any likely hood of people making me angry.
I think part of the reason people are so ignorant of other peoples pain, is because of all the stories you read in the media, pronouncing cures for all sorts of diseases, etc. and “media doctors” never show case patients who haven't recovered. I remember watching an early morning talk show and there was a doctor from a pain unit declaring “no one has to live in pain”, “we now have medications which stop all pain” etc. etc. It’s this type of doctor and media which I’m sure would cause many people who haven’t recovered to commit suicide. I actually visited the pain clinic after seeing this and specifically asked if there were any new drugs or treatments available and they offered nothing except the same treatment I had already been taking at that time.
I would also like people to note that when you say “hi how are you” to someone like me even though they may be in extreme pain they will say “I’m fine” or “I”m ok“ this does not mean they have nothing wrong with them. Its much easier for the injured person to do this as answering with ”I’m in lots of pain“ or something simular makes people want to give you the 3rd degree or makes them say things like ”yer my back goes out now and again too, you'll get over it“ or ”look on the bright side“, etc. Basically by avoiding answering ”truthfully“ it saves the injured person from more aggravation.
Health system
The health system has no system when it comes to people injured in car crashes. There is no doctor put ”in charge“ to follow the patient through to recovery, there is absolutely no follow up from hospitals or specialists.
Because of this doctors may think they have given the correct treatment or advice, and so continue using the same technique and advice. The problem is the treatment and advice may be completely wrong and because there is no system to follow up after an appointment, the doctor never finds out if the treatment or advice is wrong.
There needs to be a system put in place where someone from the hospital or specialists sends out a form to the patient to conclude whether the patient has recovered or whether the patient is unhappy with the treatment they received, etc.
I was lucky to have a good GP on my side but even he is restricted by the current system.
As an example the spinal surgeon he sent me to has qualifications both from Australia and England, so the GP would think he would be very capable of handling someone with back pain, but when I saw him the final time there was still no radiological (x-rays) proof of the cause of my back pain, I was lying on the floor in the waiting room for him and when he saw me he commented ”there's no need for that“, he gave me an examination and commented that I couldn't be that bad because he saw the callouses on my knees.
This to me says he doesn't understand back pain very well as every other severe back pain sufferer I have ever met gets a bit of relief by kneeling on one knee when there is no where to lay down. And that is exactly why I have the callouses on my knees so anyone who understands what a severe back pain sufferer goes through should know that they should have callouses on their knees and they should also understand sitting or standing makes the pain worse.
I was also amazed at the lack of respect from the pain clinic doctors and physiotherapists towards my local GP and physiotherapist, as an example from very early after the accident I had been receiving treatment from my local physiotherapist and instructions and supervision on exercises, but when I went to the pain clinic with a letter from them they wouldn't even bother reading it or would completely ignore the words in the document. Every time I went there they refused to believe I was doing rehab and asked me to start doing exercises I had already been doing. I offered for them to do a muscle test as this would prove I was doing the exercises but they never did.
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